#1

Love, it keeps what inside of you warm doesn't it?

Love. Such a thing isn't it ? It's an easy thing to find . Everywhere, everyone and everything is filled with love. There were sad break ups, but also surprising hook ups. It makes a person life much more wonderful and give a new whole lot of meaning. Love can be quite dangerous too. It can drive one's mind to be one hell of a mess.

It depends on both lovers, can they survive the waves ? can they manage the boat they are riding ?

Love has done many things to the world. It gives hope to everyone who need it. It doesn't always have to be partners. Love exists too in family, friends and also deep within pure heart. A sympathy towards others, that can be called love too (maybe).

But what love has done to me this year ?

It ripped my heart.

like my expression above, i was dumb like a cow to love

This year i found two love. Each took six months. I was tricked and thought that i finally found the one. My mind had gone crazy just to make sure things were going to be great.

But i was a fool. I should know better not to trust love that easily. One moment love took me to a very blissful feelings, and next, i was crushed, belched, dragged away, torn apart, and all those heart break words. My heart cried, my soul was dying and screaming with mental pain.

I thought the sign was obvious, i thought everything was going to be the same as i expected. But i was wrong. All of it was just a game. I took love's bait, and now it's jeering at me.

I wanted to believe love finally knock on my door. I wanted to feel the real feeling of caring for someone. To be beside somebody who i really care. To be with someone who could make my life seems worth it. But that's all just a big joke wasn't it ?

Can't i have those beautiful moments you spend with someone you love ?

Maybe it's not the right time. I kept telling myself to wait. But my heart just won't do it.
Should i give up? Let love take me wherever it wants to? Feel the sweetness despite the dreadful things ahead ?

I'm no master at love. But mentally, I am tired of all this.
I don't hate you love. But why ?!

Yet thanks to love, even though now I'm full with misery, at least some spark ignited in me.
Something that made my heart tickles. That moment i felt something more than joy.
So love, make some wonder, please.